Tips for Reducing Stress for Pantsers

Pantser: those of us who write (fly) by the seat of our pants rather than heavily plotting ahead.

TIP 1:

Pantsers tend to feel stressed by the structural elements of life, such as having to arrive somewhere at a set time.  So here’s Kathleen’s tip of the day for reducing stress: Savor each moment of the process.

For instance: if you are blow-drying your hair, rushing, to get to a meeting at 8 a.m., instead of hurrying and trying to put your make-up on at the same time, STOP. Slow down, focus on the blow-drying. Enjoy the warm air flowing over your scalp. Relish the brush whisking through your hair. Take a moment to feel grateful for having hair. Some people are losing theirs because of sickness or balding genes.

Your initial thought may be:  But I don’t have time.

ANSWER:  Give this theory a try and you’ll discover a magical secret.   Appreciating and enjoying each moment CHANGES how events unfold.   Time has a way of slowing down and accommodating us if we relish life. Go ahead, test this idea.  Try it.  See if it works for you the way it does for me.

Tell yourself:  it will all work out.  Perhaps you are rushing to get to the doctor’s office, so you hurry thorough getting ready and drive fast, only to arrive at the doctor’s to sit and wait.  Whereas if you enjoy the process strange things happen:

1. You feel happier, more relaxed, and less stressed.
2. The universe seems friendlier in response. Traffic lights cooperate, the scenery on the commute seems more pleasant, you might notice lovely cloud arrangements, or savor the smell of early morning rain. Your favorite songs come on the radio.
3. You think more clearly. Instead of frantically changing lanes, you make better decisions about the lines of traffic you choose, .
4. You find your self smiling at people, interacting more comfortably, thus eliciting a more cooperative spirit from others.

Experiment with this concept.  Try savoring each aspect of your daily tasks, even pressurized moments.   Next time, we’ll talk about how this affects your writing.  But, reducing your overall stress comes first.

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Hitting the Right Chords in Your Writing

My youngest son was playing the guitar this morning, just kicking back riffing, and I was astonished at how every chord he picked resonated with me.  I guess it shouldn’t  surprise me since he is, after all, my son.  Naturally, we have similar ear structures, common emotions, and similar likes and dislikes despite the difference in our years.

But then I reflected on how there are musicians I don’t have any personal connection to who seem to repeatedly resonate with me, too.  Diverse musicians, from Chris Botti–the absolute best jazz trumpeter ever, or Imogen Heap, who I’m sure you know, to my worn, much-loved, old Eagles albums, and even good old Mozart.   At the same time I know there are lots of people who don’t care to listen to these musicians I think are so extraordinary.

Writing is the same way.  As writers we aren’t playing for the whole world’s approbation.  We’re writing to an unknown, but specific audience. An audience that, hopefully, resonates with our particular characters and themes, an audience the “gets” the way we see the world.  We are writing for readers who feel understood and “touched” when they read our words.  They feel moved by the images, language and experiences we portray.

That takes some of the pressure off, doesn’t it? As writers’ our goal isn’t to please everyone with our work.  That’s impossible.

Besides, I write for the sheer joy of it. Like my son playing his guitar in the early morning, I sing/write whether anyone is listening or not. My goal is to compose words, thoughts, and stories from my heart, and do it well enough that they resonate in others.  I am fortunate when you write me to tell me how one of my books cheered you up when you were sick, or that your jaw dropped when you read page 146, or I made you laugh out loud at a time when you really needed it.  Thank you for your notes and letters.  They let me know someone is humming the same tune with me.